"I Want The TRUTH!!" **Brethren Blunders **

[SloppyQ]

Some time ago (Earlyer this year) I had 4 Butts, 4 Briskets, and 16 slabs of Baby Backs to cook for this bar and grill I live by and as everyone knows we should keep the grease trap in our pits clean! As the story goes I start farely early on a Sunday mourning first I get the butts and briskets on and then the ribs. Everythings is going good Temps at 230 ribs are done in about 4 hours or so. Ok some time is left for rest of meat so the fire is stoked (Offset Smoker), the race is on so I go watch, Gordon is leading so I fall asleep (sorry Gordon fans) wife wakes me up says cooker is really smokin a lot I say good and fall back to sleep, what a mistake. So from now on when Gordon is leading I don't take naps, live and learn. :roll: By the way I ended up cooking on Monday also. After I cleaned the smoker.

 

[Westexbbq]

First brisket many moons and several campfires ago on the then newly cured NB silver smoker; 6lb, store bought, thin fat cap, 6hrs smoked with mesquite and kept the chimney cap semi-closed;temp spiked a couple of times close to 300; sliced ok kinda sorta, tough as shoe leather; barely edible.

Then there was the cornish hen stuffed with raw veggies, do not try that at home.

Then the time I tried that sure-fire impregnated charcoal chit....

As the ol' lyric goes;
Getting so much better all the time
It's getting better all the time
Better, better, better
It's getting better all the time
Better, better, better

 

[Pig Up & Go]

Truth's

Reading all these posts has me in tears....Damned funny

:mrgreen::mrgreen::mrgreen:

 

[big brother smoke]

Ummmmmmmmm overcooked my briskets at the Grand Rapids Contest.

Overcooked my briskets at my wedding reception.

Filling 1/2 full Budweiser cans in my kitchen with a homemade rub for beerbutt chickens. Got the first tablespoon into first can. Grabbed second can to fill. Had a reaction better than them Mentos and pop. Slammed the second can into sink and more huge foaming action. Its a real bitch to scrub beer/rub off the kitchen ceiling.

One time threading them little hot chili peppers onto fishline for drying. Hadda pee. OMG. My little peeter burnt for hours....Next time I do it I wear rubber gloves.

Im sure more farkups are in store for me.

You almost cost me a new keyboard! I have my cocktail all over it after laughing!

 

[Norcoredneck]

I have heard when starting out, treat it like dating. Keep drinking till it all looks good!

 

[TexasGuppie]

Grilling FIASCO

While grilling steaks many years ago I proposed marriage to my girlfriend. It ended in a bitter divorce three years later after I found about her having an affair with a co-worker.

Yes friends, that was the biggest grilling fiasco I can recall. The steaks were great though.

Guppie

 

[Mark]

Originally Posted by bbqbull
Ummmmmmmmm overcooked my briskets at the Grand Rapids Contest.

Overcooked my briskets at my wedding reception.

Filling 1/2 full Budweiser cans in my kitchen with a homemade rub for beerbutt chickens. Got the first tablespoon into first can. Grabbed second can to fill. Had a reaction better than them Mentos and pop. Slammed the second can into sink and more huge foaming action. Its a real bitch to scrub beer/rub off the kitchen ceiling.

One time threading them little hot chili peppers onto fishline for drying. Hadda pee. OMG. My little peeter burnt for hours....Next time I do it I wear rubber gloves.

Im sure more farkups are in store for me.

Yeah like forgetting to take off the rubber gloves before you pee.

 

[GIRLYQUE]

Recently toasted/creamated some ABTs.
omg!
They were at the warmer end of the smoker and .....well probably a few too many Mike's Cranberry Drinks later....there was nothing left but the shell of a Jap.
Several dozen...gone....

 

[PimpSmoke]

four words

spares.......................too.....................much..................rub

 

[Mark]

Yeh pimp; I can relate. Butts; too much habanero rub.

 

[chad]

I fixed some ribs a few years ago with one of those "you gotta try these ribs" double rub yada yada recipes.

Actually, they were ok except I kept thinking these would probably be ribs from Bobby Flays place. Great texture, etc. but really curious flavors.

Not really a disaster but sure glad it was only family eating them -- I had to finish them alone!

A potential distaster was when I overloaded the Kingfisher with pork butts back in June - I had to get multiple butts (4 one time, 12 another) from the bottom of the chamber three times!! What a goat-rope. This is not a reflection on the Kingfisher - I just had it really overloaded and was using mostly boneless butts that change shape when they cook - flipped the upper shelves off!!

 

[Bill-Chicago]

Sorry David

Gotta ask.

What the hell is a goat-rope?

 

[bbqbull]

Goat Rope = F.U.B.A.R............That is for another thread for the real defination......Fark is the first letter.

 

[motley que]

One time threading them little hot chili peppers onto fishline for drying. Hadda pee. OMG. My little peeter burnt for hours....

was up at 4am firing up the smoker so i thought while it was getting to temp i would make my abt's for the day after i made them i had an itch that i scratched. my sack was burning until i tuck an ice pack on em for 10 minutes to numb my nuts (is that how numbnuts became a term)

climbed back into bed once everything was on and while laying close to the wife she noticed something cold...:twisted:

 

[Bill-Chicago]

was up at 4am firing up the smoker so i thought while it was getting to temp i would make my abt's for the day after i made them i had an itch that i scratched. my sack was burning until i tuck an ice pack on em for 10 minutes to numb my nuts (is that how numbnuts became a term)

climbed back into bed once everything was on and while laying close to the wife she noticed something cold...:twisted:

Good story mq.

I recall a few bashes ago, broadway bruce was 3/4 of the way through coring 6 dozen japs with Phil. Phils arms were stinging, and he had to get in the pool later to stop the burning

I see bruce has all kinds of jap guts and such on his hands.

I say "Bruce, whats that thing by the corner of your eye?"
(I then proceed to scratch the corner of my eye, like saying, here, right here.

Bruce says "What? What is it?" and proceeds to raise his hand up to his eye.

Right before impact, Phil stops him and says something like "You schmuck, he's trying to get you to touch your eye with a hand covered in jap juice"

It was evil, but it was funny

 

[Rockaway BeachBQ]

Over 10 years ago I made a giant pot of chili in college during the winter in upstate NY,. It included several habaneros. I finished prepping, started cooking, washed my hands and went to watch TV on the couch. After a bit I rubbed one of my eyes real hard. It burned like I have never felt since. First I ran and bent over backwards and stuck my head in the kitchen sink running water in to my eye, after a few minutes my neck started to cramp. So I wound up in an ice cold shower in the middle of the winter running water in to my eye for at least 15 minutes.

I have learned to respect the chile.

 

[JohnMcD348]

Bad Que? Never heard of it.......:biggrin:





OK, really. I can't say yet that i've had really bad stuff. I'm still too new to doing it that I still pretty much eat everything I made. There was one time that I tried a brisket in my WSM, either the 1st or 2nd time I used it. I put a brisket on and the temp spiked over 300 for a while and the brisket hit 195* after only about 6 hours. To top it all off, I was so flustered by the event that after I let it set for a few hours in the cooler, I cut it the wrong way and basically ended up with really tough stuff. I lived. I learned.

 

[CarbonToe]

Excuse me, no where in the instructions did it mention anything about REFILLING the water pan. It just said fill the pan.

So you're the person who McDonalds wrote "Contents may be HOT" on the side of their coffee cups!!!! :lol:

Good reading guys!!

I haven't screwed up apart from mistiming a Pork Shoulder and a Brisket - all the sides and other dishes were ready for a noon eats and the meat didn't turn up until 4pm!!!!! On the bright side.....more drinking time!!!

 

[Neil]

Good story mq.

I recall a few bashes ago, broadway bruce was 3/4 of the way through coring 6 dozen japs with Phil. Phils arms were stinging, and he had to get in the pool later to stop the burning

I see bruce has all kinds of jap guts and such on his hands.

I say "Bruce, whats that thing by the corner of your eye?"
(I then proceed to scratch the corner of my eye, like saying, here, right here.

Bruce says "What? What is it?" and proceeds to raise his hand up to his eye.

Right before impact, Phil stops him and says something like "You schmuck, he's trying to get you to touch your eye with a hand covered in jap juice"

It was evil, but it was funny

That was Pure Evil! Took out my contacts once 7 hours after coring some habs and 40 hand washings later still thought I was going to go blind.

Great reach into the way back machine Bill.

 

[Neil]

First brisket was done a Weber Kettle and cooked indirect like you would a turkey, 20 briquettes on each side adding four to each side every hour. If I would have had a couple of thousand like that I could have reshingled the roof!