Côtes de SPAM à la Brethrende
(recipe and story adapted from L' Auberge "Chez Richard")
Côtes de SPAM à la Brethrende
SPAM Chops Brethren-Style
Legend has it that in 2011, prior to the invasion of SPAMland by MeatBurner the Conqueror, aka
Brûleurviande II de Brethrendie or more affectionately known to his friends as MeatBurner the SPAMmer
(Brûleurviande le SPAMmeur) because of the delay of his pron posting, our good MeatBurner demanded a new dish to be created that would bring him good luck and ever-breaking winds for his invading SPAM armada patiently awaiting his command. It was Octetbiga, a foil-headed man from Plusterres d'Fark and special Chef to MeatBurner, who is credited with coming up with a special dish that pleased not only MeatBurner's palate (which helped prolong Octetbiga's life) but coincidentally brought the first stirrings of ever-breaking winds. On 12 July the Brethren fleet finally set sail, landing in Gellex, SPAMland and were greeted by the locals with something less than open arms and demanding to see their passports. To this day, in towns throughout Brethrendy, you can find a number of restaurants serving this very dish; though I understand it's not an especially big hit with the tourists from across the Great Spam Divide.
Ingredients
Some Smoked SPAM Chops
Some Eggs
A chitload of Butter
A chitload of Heavy Cream
A couple really big arse splotches of Dijon Mustard
Almost, but not quite a chitload of Breadcrumbs
A bunch of Flattish Noodles
Salt and Pepper
* I tend to guesstimate some of these ingredients as opposed to strictly following these EXACT measurements.
Preparation
Heat Butter for frying in a skillet on the kettle grill with lump charcoal.
Prepare three bowls for breading, one with Flour, one with Egg and one with Breadcrumbs.
Take a loaf of Smoked Spam (I smoked a few of these a little while back)...
...and slice into 4 SPAM Chops and dredge though the Flour, then Egg, then Breadcrumbs and put in the skillet.
Flip after a few minutes when the bottom side is browned.
Remove SPAM Chops when browned on both sides and remove the skillet from the kettle.
Add the Heavy Cream to the butter in the skillet along with the Mustard...
...and stir until smooth.
Serve SPAM Chops over Flat Noodles and cover with Sauce.
Best paired with a Jus de Pomme de Membres Marquent (white) or even a rouge Jus de Raisin de Canneberge d'Ocean Spray.
Notes on this so called "dish"
This is a
hearty meal and won't leave you leave hungry. It's also rich, I don't know if the heavy cream, eggs, and butter had anything to do with that but the SPAM certainly adds another dimension to this and I thought you should know. I used four nice sized chops (not thick) cut right off a full loaf and used Egg Noodles. I washed it down with a Jus de Pomme de Membres Marquent. No immediate swimming after this meal, but a visit to the ER may be necessary.