Today is Turkey Test Day

david · Nov 19, 2003

I got up to do my test turkey this morning at 5am. Put on pants and walk out the back door.

IT'S POURING RAIN THIS MORNING

I light the charcoal and get the farkin bandera up to temperature 2 hours later.

IT'S FARKING SNOWING NOW - IN ADDITION TO THE POURING RAIN

I put the turkey in. I think it's gonna take a lot of fuel to get this farkin bird cooked.

david · Nov 19, 2003

TURKEY TEST UPDATE

It's mostly stopped raining now, but the temperatures gone down 2 degrees, and it's snowing harder.

Bill-Chicago · Nov 19, 2003

This thread has me debating stopping at Pep Boys to get a Car Port Canvas cover for $90 like in the Bash pics.

Do you think it would be safe to cook and fry under it? I think it is tall enough to where there would not be a problem with starting a fire.

chad · Nov 19, 2003

At least you're getting a realistic "stress test".

We've got rain all day with tornado watch until 2pm. Then the fronts should get past and we'll see a drop in temp -- all the way down to, I believe, 57 tonight!!

Fall and winter in Florida really suck!! We can't even use the weather as an excuse to not cook out or go sailing!!! Our best sailing weather is starting about now and the cooler days bring out the grills and smokers in droves.

Good luck on your T-Day test.

Oldtimer · Nov 19, 2003

willkat98 said:
This thread has me debating stopping at Pep Boys to get a Car Port Canvas cover for $90 like in the Bash pics.

Do you think it would be safe to cook and fry under it? I think it is tall enough to where there would not be a problem with starting a fire.

As long as the cushion extingusher is klose by think you will be fine.

Mark · Nov 19, 2003

brd1958 said:
willkat98 said:

This thread has me debating stopping at Pep Boys to get a Car Port Canvas cover for $90 like in the Bash pics.

Do you think it would be safe to cook and fry under it? I think it is tall enough to where there would not be a problem with starting a fire.

Click to expand...

As long as the cushion extingusher is klose by think you will be fine.

I'd be worried about keeping the thing down in high winds.

david · Nov 19, 2003

To top off my test...

My wife came home for lunch and ,somewhat startled, asks me, "What happened to your driver-side car window?"

I reply, "What?"

To which she states, "It's shattered, somebody must of broken into your car last night."

To which I reply, "Farking Hell, Batman." I probably wouldn't know about it for another week since I'm not working, and don't plan on going anywhere for the next couple of days.

So I go out to the car, and yes, the 4-Runner is missing the driver's window. Not only that but MY SEAT IS SOAKED, and covered with snot.

They were nice enough to leave the garage door opener on the passenger seat, but the Farkers took my ashtray (coin holder).

Took me half an hour to clear out the garage enough to pull the car in, and in that time I lost about 60 degrees in the bandera.

To sum up:

1. Unemployed as of yesterday
2. Pouring rain
3. Snotstorm with the rain
4. Some Farking Punk smashed my car window
5. Remember I'm unemployed and have to somehow pay for my car window.
6. Turkey is doing fine

david · Nov 19, 2003

Bill-
I'm getting the baseball bat up the ass mod ready for when I find the Farker.

Mark · Nov 19, 2003

Glad to see you can keep your sense of humor amidst all your trials and tribulations.

chad · Nov 19, 2003

Baseball bat, hell! Make it a 9-iron -- twist that sucker on the way in and out!! Make a hatband out of the farker's sphincter!! :twisted:

Glad the turkey is OK.

Bill-Chicago · Nov 19, 2003

Sorry about the window.

And the car port cover. Would only be a temporary thing. We had about 30mph winds in NY at B2 on the tail end of the hurricane. Cover was just fine. but it would be easy to tie or weight it down with the way the pole bases have holes to drill or tent spike them in.

I just meant, would want snot and rain to fark up the big day.

Mark · Nov 19, 2003

The long range forecast calls for chances of showers in STL. I think I'll take your lead Bill and rig a tarp. It will be easy since my BD's on a fairly narrow patio between my house and a fence. Wouldn't have room for a car port cover anyway. Thanks for getting me thinking contingincy plans for the big T day.

david · Nov 19, 2003

DFLittle said:
Baseball bat, hell! Make it a 9-iron -- twist that sucker on the way in and out!! Make a hatband out of the farker's sphincter!! :twisted:

Glad the turkey is OK.

Apparently there's a big problem around here with cars getting broken into. Big enough that the sheriff's dept. is going to have somebody come out to do fingerprints.

chad · Nov 19, 2003

It'll go nowhere (hope it does but wouldn't bet my house payment)! We had a rash of window breakins and pellet gun shootouts (while I lived in Texas) and all the deputy told me when he came out to take my report was "I'd put my car in the garage if I was you." :evil: Well no POOPIE, Dick Tracy! If I could have put the car (beat up little Nissan station wagon work car) in the garage it would have already been in there!!

Anyway, 170 dollars later (did I mention that I had liability only??) I had a new rear window (hatchback of course -- gotta add to the costs any way I can) and never did hear from the sheriff's office.

However, a few months later deputies pulled a car over in front of my house about 1:30 am and found a ball bat in the back seat with three vatos who couldn't explain why they were in that particular part of town 4 hours after the football game was over. Had two eatin' pavement while waiting for backup.

Funny, we didn't have anymore breakage after that

david · Nov 19, 2003

Yep, it's mostly to make me feel good about the service level of the Sheriffs dept., but that's alright. The gal they sent out was cute.

tommykendall · Nov 20, 2003

Gotta love some of them women cops. I got in trouble one day when th Park Police sent this real cute one out to find some kids playing paint ball in the woods behind the house. My wife comes home and somehow my daughter tattled to her about some flirting going on between me and the cop. So they took the coin tray huh? - crack kids ya think?

Today is Turkey Test Day

david

is one Smokin' Farker

david

is one Smokin' Farker

Bill-Chicago

somebody shut me the fark up.

chad

somebody shut me the fark up.

Oldtimer

is one Smokin' Farker

Mark

somebody shut me the fark up.

david

is one Smokin' Farker

david

is one Smokin' Farker

Mark

somebody shut me the fark up.

chad

somebody shut me the fark up.

Bill-Chicago

somebody shut me the fark up.

Mark

somebody shut me the fark up.

david

is one Smokin' Farker

chad

somebody shut me the fark up.

david

is one Smokin' Farker

tommykendall

Quintessential Chatty Farker

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