Welcome Michelle, and thanks for your husband's (and your) service. Good luck tackling a job for that many people, when you are doing all the cooking, 30-40 doesn't seem like a small crowd. There are a lot of great folks here and I'm sure they'll be happy to share their knowledge as you learn (and spend) and learn (and spend some more). You will find that we love to spend each other's money around here.
For that many people, I would go with something foolproof and that you probably already have the capacity for with your present cooker, and that's just good old Boston butts and do pulled pork. You could even find a good sauce recipe among the thousands online these days, and impress your guests with the tasty condiment as well.
Good luck and be sure to post any questions you may have.
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