עָטִין
The BBQ BRETHREN FORUMS.


Forum Portal Recipes Smoke Signals Magazine Welocme Merchandise Associations Purchase Subscription Brethren Banners
Go Back   The BBQ BRETHREN FORUMS. > Discussion Area > Q-talk

Notices

Q-talk *ON TOPIC ONLY* QUALITY ON TOPIC discussion of Backyard BBQ, grilling, Equipment and just outdoor cookin' in general, hints, tips, tricks & techniques, success, failures... but stay on topic. And watch for that hijacking.


Reply
Thread Tools
Unread 03-12-2013, 03:18 PM   #1
Gore
Phizzy

 
Gore's Avatar
 
Join Date: 10-05-08
Location: Hiding out from blood suck ghost snake gods, Nazis and scrap iron chefs trying to harvest body parts
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default Cooking with the Master: Episode XX, Pizza

What follows is the transcript of “Cooking with the Master: Pizza, Episode XX”

Master: Ladies, Gentlemen, Goood Eeeevening! And welcome to "Cooking with the Master," a show about cooking. I ... am the Master! Joined by co-chef Smokey and our sous chef Gore, I will demonstrate revolutionary advances in BBQ science. Today, we will be making pizza.

I (Gore): Master, are you sure this is a good idea? I hardly think that pizza is considered BBQ. Where does KCBS stand on this?

Master: Pizza is traditionally made in wood-fired ovens and many Brethren make pizzas in their BBQs. Of course, we will begin in the traditional manner by making ribs.

I (Gore): Ribs, Master?

Master: Yes, Gore, we will prepare these in an Italian fashion, seasoning them with salt and pepper, basil, oregano, as Smokey demonstrates.



I (Gore): Smokey?

Master: Yes, now Smokey will place these in the Oval.



I (Gore): Master, I think I need a vacation. I thought we were making pizza and … I keep getting flashbacks when I see Ninja … errr, Smokey.

Master: All will be made clear in time. Can you pull the lever of the transmorgraphier, please. The inspection is today.

[sparks and smoke fly, and three heads appear in a puff of blue smoke]



Narrator: Why it’s Moose, Bigabyte and … Smokey!

[Audience claps and cheers]

I (Gore): Eak, a Ghost!

Ninja: Squeak!

[Gore runs out of the laboratory screaming in terror]

[Audience laughs]

Master: Smokey, put your head back on and quit torturing our assistant… Excuse me, inspectors, and welcome to our lab. I’m sure you’ll find that everything is in order. We’re currently making stuffed-crust pizza.

Moose: I believe the term “stuffed-crust pizza” is trademarked. You’re not allowed to say that here.

Bigabyte: Yes, I’ll put you down for a major infraction and 1000 points.

[Audience cheers]

Master: I think you’ll find our new stuff-in-the-crust pizza to be a major BBQ innovation and truly tasty.

Moose: We’re not about innovation. We’re about making the Brethren a friendlier, safer environment for BBQ.

Bigabyte: We want to make sure all threads are quality and on topic, and that the discussion remains clean.

Moose: We keep a tally of your infractions. Get enough points and you’ve earned a one-way trip to the Wood Pile.

Master: That would be terrible for our ratings.

Moose: Yes, but you could always rub some bacon on it.

Bigabyte: I’m sensing a low level of helpfulness within this episode and will add another 500 points.

[Audience cheers again]

Master: I think the level of unhelpfulness can be directly attributed to this inspection.

Bigabyte: Good point! That will be an additional 250 points for each inspector!

Master: We are just demonstrating our new pizza. As you are well aware, traditional cheese-stuffed crust lacks flavor.

Moose: I like cheese. Nachos and pizza both have cheese, 500 more points.

Bigabyte: Even SPAMfish nachos have cheese. That’ll be an additional 2000 points.

Master: Yes, of course, but we are developing revolutionary BBQ. My partner Smokey is just now finishing the ribs with a pizza sauce.



Moose: I can see you cannot distinguish a pizza from a rack of ribs.

[audience laughs]

Bigabyte: I can’t wait to get back to my body so I can mark this entire thread as “unhelpful.” I’m adding 10,000 points to my tally. That’s enough for a trip to the penalty box. See you there!

[Inspectors disappear in a puff of blue smoke]

I (Gore): Well, that went so much better than last time.

Master: Agreed, being banished to the Throwdown Forum was definitely worse.

I (Gore): I see Smokey has trimmed the ribs.



Master: Now, with the pizza dough rolled out, we can wrap the sauced ribs into the crust.



We add our sauce, cheese, and toppings of choice: pepperoni, sausage and sauteed mushrooms. This went into the Oval for about 5 minutes and we have our stuffed crust pizza!



and the crust is something to be savored, with just as much flavor as the rest of the slice!



I (Gore): Looks like that’s a wrap!

Smokey: Squeak!



Narrator: This episode of “Cooking with the Master” was brought to you by the BBQ Brethren Throwdown sub-forum found at the top of Q-talk or at
http://www.bbq-brethren.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=86

Please join us every week to enter and/or vote for your favorite entry. There are lots of great dishes described in the entry threads. The recipes and views expressed on “Cooking with the Master” do not necessarily represent those of the BBQ Brethren, Moose, Bigabyte, Gore, Q-Talk, or Smokey (or Ninja) Squirrel. Note that all characters in this episode are purely fictional, and any resemblance to actual Brethren is purely coincidental.
__________________
Assistant to a Mad BBQ Scientist (and a squirrel): Primo Oval XL, Small Offset, Gasser, Optigrill, UBS
"I love everything about the pig, even the way she walks." -- Spanish proverb
(\__/)
(='.'=) This is the rabbit baby. Invests him in yours signature,
(")_(") and the help rabbit baby takes over control of the world!
Hmmmm, I wonder, WWGALD? Avatar courtesy of Grillman and NorthwestBBQ

Promoted by Bigabyte to "Idiot #1" , and dubbed "Phizzy" by Sir Ron.

Last edited by Gore; 03-12-2013 at 03:43 PM..
Gore is online now   Reply With Quote


1 members found this post helpful.
Unread 03-12-2013, 03:21 PM   #2
Fatback Joe
is Blowin Smoke!

 
Fatback Joe's Avatar
 
Join Date: 01-07-08
Location: Memphis, TN
Downloads: 1
Uploads: 0
Default

Farking awesome, as always.
__________________
FBJ

WSM
Medium Spicewine
Stumps GF223
KCBS, NEBS Member
Fatback Joe is offline   Reply With Quote


Thanks from:--->
Unread 03-12-2013, 03:27 PM   #3
Oldbob
is One Chatty Farker

 
Oldbob's Avatar
 
Join Date: 08-24-06
Location: Kokomo,Indiana
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

Fantastic Lookin Pizza !!
__________________
Chargriller Akorn
Drum Smoker " Old Smokey " Work in Progress
Kingsford Premium Charcoal Grill
Weber Gasser Genesis Silver A
Pit Barrel Cooker
Maverick ET-732
VietNam Veteran US Navy
May you Sleep in Peace always...and Please....Thank a Veteran for That Privilege!!
Oldbob is offline   Reply With Quote


Thanks from:--->
Unread 03-12-2013, 03:29 PM   #4
deguerre
somebody shut me the fark up.


 
deguerre's Avatar
 
Join Date: 07-15-09
Location: Memphis, TN...Formerly of Decatur, AL
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

I dunno. I Think Smoky needs more flare...

OK, that's the other entry I might vote for! The two I narrowed it down to both involved ribs specifically smoked for the pizzas.
__________________
Guerry >^..^< Pit Beeatch for Team Munchkin
Avatar by Northwest BBQ
I took the Art History Comps, and Passed on the first try.
deguerre is online now   Reply With Quote


1 members found this post helpful.
Thanks from: --->
Unread 03-12-2013, 03:35 PM   #5
Big Bears BBQ
is One Chatty Farker
 
Join Date: 03-06-11
Location: Hillsdale,Mi.
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

Pretty cool .....
Big Bears BBQ is offline   Reply With Quote


Thanks from:--->
Unread 03-12-2013, 03:42 PM   #6
Will work for bbq
Babbling Farker


 
Will work for bbq's Avatar
 
Join Date: 06-23-10
Location: Moominland formerly known as Earth.
Downloads: 15
Uploads: 0
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by deguerre View Post
I dunno. I Think Smoky needs more flare...

OK, that's the other entry I might vote for! The two I narrowed it down to both involved ribs specifically smoked for the pizzas.
Linguiça contains rib meat.



Just kidding, needed a clever bookmak so I can read this later in case it doesn't get bumped.
__________________
Paul
00 Slowskys Racing
CharGriller Acorn Komado AKA Milton (RIP), WGA, WSM 18.5", WSM 22.5" BBQ Guru Digi Q, Weber Kettles, Genisis Gold Gasser, Orange and Red ThermaPens and a Partridge in a Avocado tree.

Agent 000 (Double O Zero)
Certified MOINK Baller

When all else fails just ask yourself, WWGALD???
Super sexy Farkernaut Avatar by N8man

Quote:
Originally Posted by Abraham Lincoln View Post
"The trouble with quotes on the internet is that it is nearly impossible to discern if they are genuine."
Will work for bbq is offline   Reply With Quote


1 members found this post helpful.
Thanks from: --->
Unread 03-12-2013, 03:44 PM   #7
Groundhog66
Babbling Farker
 
Join Date: 08-20-10
Location: Livermore, CA
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

What an original idea, that is awesome.
__________________
Tim -



[COLOR=Yellow]
[/COLOR]
Groundhog66 is offline   Reply With Quote


Thanks from: --->
Unread 03-12-2013, 04:03 PM   #8
chicagokp
is Blowin Smoke!

 
chicagokp's Avatar
 
Join Date: 02-17-11
Location: Chicago north 'burbs IL
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

destined to be a classic
__________________
UDS - Midi Me - Weber Performer - 22.5 Weber OTG - Weber Genesis - GOSM

White Lightning Thermopen
chicagokp is offline   Reply With Quote


Thanks from:--->
Unread 03-12-2013, 04:05 PM   #9
bigabyte
somebody shut me the fark up.

 
bigabyte's Avatar
 
Join Date: 05-10-06
Location: Overland Fark, KS
Downloads: 1
Uploads: 1
Default

Wait a minute. What am I doing in a Q-Talk thread that ISN'T about MOINK?

Oh well, I can at least help make this thread even more about me I suppose.

Oh, and that pizza (and stuffed crust) looks fantastic! Way too much quality for that wacko Throwdown forum.

Are you sure you should have even posted this on this site at all?

Sadly, I have no certificates to give you for this as there is no MOINK to be found anywhere. However, if you win, then you can get a Throwdown certificate, but you have to get that from Moose instead, so I'm not sure whether or not you think that's much better.

Tell Smokey I said hi!
__________________
Asshattatron Farkanaut, CGCFO
Chief Galactic Crockpot Foil Officer
Certified MOINK Baller & IMBAS Certified MOINK Ball Judge #0003 - Are you MOINK Certified?
Sole recipient of the Silverfinger and fingerlickin Awards!

Don't forget about the Throwdown Thingies!
The Secret Squirrel Society doesn't exist - Zero Club



Duh.
bigabyte is offline   Reply With Quote


0 members found this post helpful.
Thanks from: --->
Unread 03-12-2013, 04:32 PM   #10
caliking
is One Chatty Farker

 
caliking's Avatar
 
Join Date: 01-13-10
Location: Houston, TX
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

Now that's innovation! I wish I had seen this thread before casting my TD vote... didn't realize the the crust had ribs IN it.
__________________
EZ wood handled 3 wheeler | OTS | OTS mod to OTG | Ladybug SS Performer | UglyDrumTandoor | UDS v1 | midi UDS with red nipples | SJG smoker mod | Simpsons SJS | Simpsons OTG | WGA charcoal | SJP | Stacked brick WFO | Lodge Logic Sportsman's Grill cast iron hibachi/sigri | LBGE | sbge | mini bge
caliking is online now   Reply With Quote


Thanks from:--->
Unread 03-12-2013, 05:55 PM   #11
Will work for bbq
Babbling Farker


 
Will work for bbq's Avatar
 
Join Date: 06-23-10
Location: Moominland formerly known as Earth.
Downloads: 15
Uploads: 0
Default

BRAVO!!



Brilliantly cast an instant classic, I love how Ninj.... I mean Smokey's head is detachable.
__________________
Paul
00 Slowskys Racing
CharGriller Acorn Komado AKA Milton (RIP), WGA, WSM 18.5", WSM 22.5" BBQ Guru Digi Q, Weber Kettles, Genisis Gold Gasser, Orange and Red ThermaPens and a Partridge in a Avocado tree.

Agent 000 (Double O Zero)
Certified MOINK Baller

When all else fails just ask yourself, WWGALD???
Super sexy Farkernaut Avatar by N8man

Quote:
Originally Posted by Abraham Lincoln View Post
"The trouble with quotes on the internet is that it is nearly impossible to discern if they are genuine."
Will work for bbq is offline   Reply With Quote


Thanks from: --->
Unread 03-12-2013, 05:56 PM   #12
Will work for bbq
Babbling Farker


 
Will work for bbq's Avatar
 
Join Date: 06-23-10
Location: Moominland formerly known as Earth.
Downloads: 15
Uploads: 0
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by caliking View Post
Now that's innovation! I wish I had seen this thread before casting my TD vote... didn't realize the the crust had ribs IN it.
I'm glad you didn't.
__________________
Paul
00 Slowskys Racing
CharGriller Acorn Komado AKA Milton (RIP), WGA, WSM 18.5", WSM 22.5" BBQ Guru Digi Q, Weber Kettles, Genisis Gold Gasser, Orange and Red ThermaPens and a Partridge in a Avocado tree.

Agent 000 (Double O Zero)
Certified MOINK Baller

When all else fails just ask yourself, WWGALD???
Super sexy Farkernaut Avatar by N8man

Quote:
Originally Posted by Abraham Lincoln View Post
"The trouble with quotes on the internet is that it is nearly impossible to discern if they are genuine."
Will work for bbq is offline   Reply With Quote


Thanks from: --->
Unread 03-12-2013, 06:06 PM   #13
Bluesman
Babbling Farker

 
Bluesman's Avatar
 
Join Date: 01-01-10
Location: Fond du Lac, WI
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

Your brain is defiantly going to Smithsonian some day.....for sure..
__________________
2000 Weber Simpsons OTG
2010 22.5 WSM
Smokin' Bucky UDS
Weber Q200
1983 WGA
Early 70's Red Weber Statesman
1995 Red Weber Master Touch
2010 Brick Red Touch n' Go Performer
Bluesman is online now   Reply With Quote


Thanks from: --->
Unread 03-13-2013, 11:09 AM   #14
Gore
Phizzy

 
Gore's Avatar
 
Join Date: 10-05-08
Location: Hiding out from blood suck ghost snake gods, Nazis and scrap iron chefs trying to harvest body parts
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

Hey, what happened to the unhelpfulness?
__________________
Assistant to a Mad BBQ Scientist (and a squirrel): Primo Oval XL, Small Offset, Gasser, Optigrill, UBS
"I love everything about the pig, even the way she walks." -- Spanish proverb
(\__/)
(='.'=) This is the rabbit baby. Invests him in yours signature,
(")_(") and the help rabbit baby takes over control of the world!
Hmmmm, I wonder, WWGALD? Avatar courtesy of Grillman and NorthwestBBQ

Promoted by Bigabyte to "Idiot #1" , and dubbed "Phizzy" by Sir Ron.
Gore is online now   Reply With Quote


Thanks from:--->
Unread 03-13-2013, 11:36 AM   #15
Phubar
somebody shut me the fark up.
 
Join Date: 04-24-09
Location: Utrecht,The NetherPharkinglands
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

I've waited a couple of years to say this.....Gore,you need help.
__________________
-TG
-WGA (3)
-UDS (S,M,L)

All fueled by Ecobrasa Coco Briquettes

*Lowland Smokers Dutch BBQ Champion 2011 - 2012*
*Lowland Smokers Dutch BBQ Champion 2013 Low 'n Slow
*WGA Ambassador
Phubar is offline   Reply With Quote


Thanks from: --->
Reply

Tags
Cooking with the Master, Pizza

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Loading



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:07 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
vBulletin Optimisation provided by vB Optimise v2.6.0 Beta 4 (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2014 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
2003 -2012 © BBQ-Brethren Inc. All rights reserved. All Content and Flaming Pig Logo are registered and protected under U.S and International Copyright and Trademarks. Content Within this Website Is Property of BBQ Brethren Inc. Reproduction or alteration is strictly prohibited.