Temp Probes and Brisket

B

barbefunkoramaque

Guest
I just recently visited a couple of BBQ joints in my home town and am furious that they are allowed to make brisket in TEXAS.

One is a cool looking shack and meat market and the other is what I would build if I wanted to make another BBQ resturant that was not Funk, Soul and R and B based. He uses two Mesquite, Texas Built Oylers. God those are the Chit. Another claims to smoke for 24 hours.

Anyway, I think that anyone that uses and Depends on Temp probes for doneness should be dipped in Liquid Nitrogen and shot out of a cannon against a wall or another idiot... say the ones that make brisket at or near 210 degrees. There... see I can be diplomatic and non-abrasive in my criticisms.

Probes in brisket are to be used only to judge how much longer you have or maybe where you are at. Somewhere near 170-170 I want all of you with those probes worth more than say.... $40 to get a pair of wire cutters and CUT OFF the farking electronics and shove them up your arse!

THEN use the Farkin probe to test for doneness. When it passes through BOTH the point and flat like butter... OR with more resistance for those slicing at the, idiotic thickness of number a 2 pencil to make those pretty little fans of brisket, then its DONE. NOT at 180, 190, not 205... when the probe goes through right. Oh and those that want to byatch about poking holes in the Q... Fark all of you too!

Now also remember that in this forum, there is no right or wrong way to make BBQ and we all are to be nice and diplomatic in our discussions about technique.

One step at a time man... first I will correct all the BBQ mistakes made in Texas since I left, then I will conquer the Rhineland, Czechs, then Obliterate the Kansians, then Poland, then Russian and finally the WORLD!

For those of you thinking of probes for brisket... a bent Gutter nail is perfect.
 
thanks I now have a clue as to what I did wrong lol forgot to cut the probe and stick in my butt oops my bad .. next time i will try that lol
 
What have you been smokin and drinkin????????
What makes you think your better then everyone else here?????
Not being mean but . . . . . . . . . . . you seem to be real full of yourself.

If I get in trouble for this post so be it.
 
Please don't hold back next time! It's okay to release all your pent up brisket anger. Then take your meds and go to bed.
 
Keep preaching it Funk. Listening and learning. Remember we all have to start somewhere and we need a Master of Disaster to show us the path. I kinda liked my brisket fan. It could have been on the cover of National BBQ Weekly .
 
Yep, barbefunk is quite a character, but I agree with him on most of this. I've never had much luck cooking brisket by going by a temp reading. I always have just gone by bark color (that I like to see), and then insert a probe (or butter knife) to see if I like the resistance.

However....far be it from me to suggest that any other method is incorrect. To each their own. If you like the end product...you done good.
 
thanks I now have a clue as to what I did wrong lol forgot to cut the probe and stick in my butt oops my bad .. next time i will try that lol


NO NO the probe you use... its the everything from the wire back you can throw away... LOL
 
What have you been smokin and drinkin????????
What makes you think your better then everyone else here?????
Not being mean but . . . . . . . . . . . you seem to be real full of yourself.

If I get in trouble for this post so be it.

What makes you think more than one question mark is not superfluous?


If your one of those types of people with thin skins and can't see the humor in the post... or rather the irony... just put me on ignore.

LOL People... LOL
 
I get a similar chuckle when the probe goes in too early...... Like when the brisket is still raw instead of waiting half or 2/3 of the gusstimated cook time before checking.

In many of my write-ups and forum posts I was always recommending the use of an ice pick to judge doneness of butts and brisket. Then this guy writes me and says something like "hey man, no one has an ice pick anymore".....and he was right, I never thought of that. I did make up some of these one year from left over stainless. They work as a not only a meat probe tool, but they plug the hole from the thermometer when I rest meats. The "T" also won't poke a hole in the foil when meats are resting in the cooler. After a big summer barbecue I noticed a few didn't come home with me. :biggrin:

DSC04260.jpg
 
Eye... I love you cuz you are old school baby... (look at me with my stoker and being all loud mouthed about old school and some will get my humor)

I had to check the doneness of maybe 11 briskets at a time on a spinning rack cuz my Meat mama pit didn't have a stop pedal of the rotisserie.

I used an old sharpening tool that a certain someone in Lockhart, texas gave me. It was maybe 50 years old and not as thick as a new one. But If that past through with no problems you had Mecca Style Brisket. I lost it in Friedrich pit, I owned at one time. I was sad because the pitmaster that gave it to me is now dead.

Dull the end of those Ice Picks though... grind them flat.

I get a similar chuckle when the probe goes in too early...... Like when the brisket is still raw instead of waiting half or 2/3 of the gusstimated cook time before checking.

In many of my write-ups and forum posts I was always recommending the use of an ice pick to judge doneness of butts and brisket. Then this guy writes me and says something like "hey man, no one has an ice pick anymore".....and he was right, I never thought of that. I did make up some of these one year from left over stainless. They work as a not only a meat probe tool, but they plug the hole from the thermometer when I rest meats. The "T" also won't poke a hole in the foil when meats are resting in the cooler. After a big summer barbecue I noticed a few didn't come home with me. :biggrin:

DSC04260.jpg
 
dang it i have had the stoker in my but and the probe is the only thing left now I have to cut it off lol .. one day I will be a brisket cook .. till then the probe and the stoker will help me learn lol
 
and if you cannot read past the humor in the reply . . . . then ignore me.
 
Ain't stickin nothin in my rear. Must be a good old boy Texan thing. Main thin is when the cook sticks it in the pie hole and down the gullet and he is happy then that is good BBQ.
 
You guys use a probe? Arrrg! I don't like no leaky holes in mmmmy brisket... :mrgreen:
 
Well there is a guy named Larry with team BLQ that would somewhat agree with you. He only uses temp. to determine where he is at on his timeline. He says it is feel and SMELL of the meat...Not sure I will ever get good enough to know by smell.
 
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