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BBQ Brethren Throwdowns Join us in the backyard for a fun weekly contest and show off your BBQ creations! New categories are posted each week. Winners earn bragging rights, a Throwdown Certificate, and the chance to choose the next week's category. Fun people only please! If you take this too seriously you will have to leave the party until you are fun again.


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Old 05-11-2012, 06:59 AM   #1
bigabyte
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Join Date: 05-10-06
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Arrow BBQ Brethren "KnucklHed's Big Farking TD About Nothing" Throwdown!

Our new category is...

"KucklHed's Big Farking TD About Nothing!"

Anyone have a copy of this that is written in farking English???

...as chosen by KnucklHed BBQ, the winner of the Stadium Food Throwdown!

Here is the PM KnucklHed sent to me about this one...
Quote:
Originally Posted by KnucklHed BBQ
You know, at times in the past, I think I had categories picked out that I would want to do... but since the time it became pretty clear that I'd win the Stadium TD, I've been racking my lil brain trying to come up with an idea that hasn't been done (least that I know of or recently).
All I've come up with is "Anything But SPAMfish" or "With Pants" And I just know that somehow you would come up with a loophole in the "Anything but SPAMfish" category and get it in anyways, and I'm positive that the "With Pants" TD would end up with pics of Gore in his skivies next to the oval and a pair of pants smoldering on the grill... You see my dilemma.

(The following may or may not be a real conversation that happened, but most of it did)

So then my wife says "How about Amuse Bouche?"

"That sounds gay and rhymes with douche, no way! And what is it BTW?"

"Well, it's french for..." she starts.

I cut her off, "Yup, I knew it! Even worse than I thought! I can't suggest some crappy frenchie food... Chris will call me a tree huggin' commie pinko! Not again I say! Not again!"

"No, it means "mouth amuser" she starts again.

"Oh, yeah, that makes it better! You don't realize that these guys can't forget a single thing that happens around there... they still talk about Shane's brisket like it happened yesterday!"

"Babe, nobody would think you're a commie tree humper or whatever just cuz you suggest a french appetizer for a throwdown... besides, it's kind of a cool idea, the chef sends out a single fancy bite for guests to sample, it's not on the menu and they don't order it, he just sends it out to them."

"Uhh, you mean like Nouvelle Cuisine? Like the one they did a year or so ago? The one where I made a mini taco, mini tostada and a mini taco salad? The one where I used smoked prime rib, tri-tip and skirt steak, the holy trifecta of beef and served it with tomato caviar and avocado whipped creme?? The one that I got like 3 sympathy votes in?? That one??!!"

"Hmm, I think I do remember that one, still a bit sore about it huh?"

"Hmmpff! But that does give me an idea... What if... What if we did a category that was kind of a "Chef's Choice" but not like it is usually thought of..."

So here it is - When we cook for the family, friends or crowds, there is ALWAYS a delicious little nugget that they never get served. Perhaps it's that crispy little bit of fat on a brisket, the perfect piece of bark on a butt, the best looking end from a rack of ribs, a perfect thigh, heck I don't care if it's just the best looking hot dog on the gasser...

I want to see what you keep for yourself when no one else is looking.
I want you to share with us that which you share with no one else.
I want to know what you covet.
I want to know why.

That leaves it pretty open ended and will allow for a lot of "fork shots" Get out that macro lens fellas!
....YAWN!!! Did anyone else farking read that, and can give me the condensed version?

So, there you have it...that is the category, somewhere up in there...and the special rules are probably up in there somewhere too.

Oh, KnucklHed also sent this...

Quote:
Originally Posted by KnucklHed BBQ
Oh and as for a name??? I dunno, how about "Knucklhed's Big Farkin' TD About Nothing"? Too corny?
Thank goodness!!! Now I don't have to read that other message to figure out what this one is called!

Click here to read the rules for the BBQ Brethren Throwdown...

You may submit entries that are cooked from Friday 5/11 through Sunday 5/20.

Entry pictures must be submitted by 6 a.m. Central US Time on Monday morning 5/21.

By submitting entry photos to this Throwdown thread you are agreeing that you have read and understand the Throwdown Rules.

The voting will begin Monday 5/21 after the "Vote" thread is submitted and will run through Sunday 5/27. All votes will be public.

Don't forget, you can still enter the "Man vs Food" Throwdown until Monday morning 5/14 by 6am Central time.

Our next category will be decided by the winner of the "Taco" Throwdown!

Best of luck and even better eats to all!
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Old 05-11-2012, 07:11 AM   #2
deguerre
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So, we're supposed to cook a Seinfeld episode? I don't think my flat screen will fit on the Weber...
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Old 05-11-2012, 07:34 AM   #3
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Oooo! I know! No soup for you!
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Old 05-11-2012, 07:44 AM   #4
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I'm master of my domain!
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Old 05-11-2012, 07:46 AM   #5
deguerre
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Newman!
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Old 05-11-2012, 07:46 AM   #6
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My g/f did mention the other day that if I bought a new smoker before her something shinny that she'd make me sleep it. I told her that'd be fine cause I could just set a fire and be warm as could be ... to which she replies ... yeah but if you're IN the smoker who's going to make sure they spray you with AJ every hour so you don't dry out? ... I think i'm creating a monster
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Old 05-11-2012, 08:57 AM   #7
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He said Mouth Amuser. I have a Mouth Amuser for you, you farkin' tree humper.
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Old 05-11-2012, 09:08 AM   #8
deguerre
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Word is, he's a Canadian too...















NTTAWWT












Just to take the Seinfeld theme a little further...
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Old 05-11-2012, 09:23 AM   #9
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I am not going to forget this one. Amuse Bouche indeed. Oral tease!
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Old 05-11-2012, 09:46 AM   #10
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Oh good, I had to read the Memorial Day TD's rules about 50 times before I could figure out which TD are NOT happening for the next 2 weeks, and now I have to find one little nugget of something gay from Alsace, that rhymes with douch, that I can only eat when no one's looking and then take a fork shot of it to show you farkers, tell you why I did it and expect no one to judge me.

Since I don't even know if that conversation actually happened, I don't even know which one of you to blame...farkers.
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Old 05-11-2012, 09:48 AM   #11
deguerre
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It's ALWAYS "I blame Ronelle" for future reference...
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Old 05-11-2012, 09:50 AM   #12
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I think gay food from Normandy is allowed too, so you don't have to do that gay stuff from Alsace if you don't want to.
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Old 05-11-2012, 10:05 AM   #13
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Looks like I found the perfect TD for you whack-a-doodles...

BTW - I heard that the General might be making an appearance in this one... Anyone think his old engrish is better than his new?




































canadian....
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Old 05-11-2012, 10:18 AM   #14
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Ok, so I read the special rules 3 times and then the actual rule and from what I can gather essentially we are cooking nothing?
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Old 05-11-2012, 10:20 AM   #15
deguerre
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Moving right along...
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