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Grain Belt said:

I don't pretend to know your situation so this is only pure speculation...

It is certainly possible that it is purely a personal preference/taste issue and your wife just doesn't like smoked/spiced foods.

It also could be a bit of a power struggle where she disapproves of your hobby or attention to it and she is showing her irritation by being overly critical of the food. I am a bit of a grill fanatic and can tell my wife is irritated if I focus on my hobby a little too much. Again, just spitballing a bit and I don't pretend to know your relationship with your wife.

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Well sure its a personal preference/taste issue, but has been getting worse in the last couple years. I have backed way off what you call a hobby I used to do competitions but no more, and it is the only one I have so don't think that is it either. Just getting very difficult to come up with things I think she can eat, when I have very little trouble eating almost anything. Really do not want to cook several things each night so she can eat one of them. The problem is also exasperated by my son and grandson with their different taste. Sometimes I feel like a short order cook in a little dinner out in the woods. Makes it hard to make ends meet when you have to shop and cook for 4 different taste, and to make it worse I am the only one that will touch leftovers.:mmph:
Dave

Just wanted to thank all those that have offered suggestions to my dilemma. I really was not looking for a solution, just needed to blow off some steam. I will just continue as usual meaning I will do my best to please her, because I can eat anything, and can kick things up on my plate if need be. I will waver from time to time, and fix things the way I want, she will just have to suffer through or eat something else. Again thanks for allowing me to vent, hope I don't sound selfish. For those that do not have this kind of problem, you just don't know how lucky you are.
Dave

landarc said:

You might consider that bitter is the real culprit. Women, in particular, are more sensitive to bitter flavor compounds (science, not opinion) and react to the bitter elements in pepper and chile in a very different manner than men do. Smoke has a bitter component as well, but, most of us do not taste it. Those who are sensitive to it find it extremely objectionable. Although he is not a woman :mrgreen:, my BIL is very sensitive to bitter and cannot stand red wines, IPA's and smoked meats.

I tend not to smoke for him and I don't waste any beer on him either. In terms of your wife, that is a tricky problem, as she get's older, her tastes may become even more defined. Best thing is to learn to cook for two different palates.

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Thanks for the incite. I really have been making an effort to cut back on the smoke I put on meat, even thought about getting a pellet smoker, because I keep hearing it is a little harder to get a deep smoke. Ok I admit its the best reason to get me a pellet smoker I can come up with.:icon_blush:
Dave

Butt Rubb'n BBQ said:

Yes sir. You're wife and mine must be sisters from another mother. Me and my 10 year old daughter kill about 6 or 7 deer a year and my wife won't eat deer meat. So when we cook venison I grill her a filet. What are you cooking with? When I smoke on my stick burner my wife hates it. When I cook on my home made backyard pit with just charcoal and a few apple chips she loves it.

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My son and I are the only ones that will eat deer, in fact none of them will eat any kind of wild meat. I was raised up almost entirely eating off the land, domestic and wild. At this time I use my UDS but most of the time I am grilling on the gasser these days, and don't smoke nearly as much as I used to. Funny thing is when I used to smoke almost every week she had no complaints and actually seemed to enjoy it. She wont even have sauce unless it has no heat and is way over the top sweet.
Dave

DJK said:

I'm far too new here to feel it's my place to give you my unfiltered opinion, so I'll simply offer the friendly reminder that you don't have to, and if you choose to enable a certain kind of behavior, your rant should probably be directed at yourself.

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Guess I should clarify. I usually can fix something we all can eat, so I am not cooking for 4 different taste every day, but it is somewhat of a trick to please everyone at the same time. This does not always happen, with a 4 year old that can either hate or love the same thing on a different day. As for my wife, she seriously can not handle spicy, or heavely smoked meat, this seams to have gotten worse the last couple years and it is a bit frustrating, since I used to smoke something every week and she always loved it.

I don't believe I am allowing a certain kind of behavior, but I do like to see people enjoy the food I set before them, rather than tossing it into the trash later on. I can not force others to eat something they do not like, especially my wife, or a 30 year old. For instance my son will, and has become physically sick to his stomach when I am cooking any kind of sausage, it begins as he is walking down the sidewalk and gets worse the closer he gets, until he is standing in my kitchen puking in the trash can and complaining of a migraine. You really are not suggesting I force him to eat sausage right. As for leftovers, I usually can work them into other meals, many times they don't even know it, but if they do and I put it on their plate they will eat it, they just wont reach in the fridge and pull it out on their own.

I married into a family that tends to be very particular about their food, and even can become sick from it. On the other hand and a big part of the problem, is I can eat just about anything with no ell effects, making it hard for me to understand others lack of enjoyment of all foods. Life would be so much easier if everyone could eat like I do, but that ant gong to happen. Having said all that sometimes I do cook different things for the same meal, for reasons I have mentioned, or due to the fact there is something I really want on any given night, so in the end you may be right, maybe my rant is about me and not them. Gess looks like another rant.:redface:
Dave

cholloway said:

Hell Dave, she's just gettin' more crotchety as she gets older just like most of us! :mrgreen:
(don't tell her I said that)

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That's for sure, but then so am I.:twitch:
Dave