Great write up! You must write advertizing for a living. Just the right dash of technical speak where regular words would do.
Chargriller Super Pro with a big ol rust hole and a mouse nest
The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things.... The good things don't always soften the bad things, and vice-versa, the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant.
"Vincent and the Doctor" episode