View Single Post
Old 10-14-2010, 06:58 AM   #58
somebody shut me the fark up.
bigabyte's Avatar
Join Date: 05-10-06
Location: Overland Fark, KS

Originally Posted by Gore View Post
Forget the sausage, how did you make your pecan pie?

And it took you 3 days to eat one fattie?

A fattie a day keeps the doctor away.
I didn't make the pie, it came from a bakery. They prided themselves by saying they used real maple syrup, brown sugar, and butter. But now that I think about it, they never said anything about real pecans!

Normally, a fatty doesn't last more than 30 minutes after it is pulled off of the smoker. This fatty was a bit more substantial.

While it was only composed of a paltry one pound of sausage, wrapped with a mere 1 pound of bacon, it was also filled with roughly half of a pecan pie, and dusted with brown sugar for good measure. I do not have the exact nutritional info, but I imagine it had some lasting power in terms of calories, perhaps more substantial than your typical energy bar.

The first day, I ate half of it before I even realized it. It was so blissful that it put me in a stupor for the rest of the day. The next day I made sure to eat my Wheaties for breakfast, instead of the fatty. This gave me sufficient strength to tackle 1/2 of the remaining fatty at lunch without the intoxicating rapture, allowing me to make further contributions to society. I took a similar approach yesterday when I finished the last of it.

I equate this approach to eating some food and drinking some water before drinking alcohol, really. It's just a good idea to take some measures ahead of time to allow yourself some indulgence of this reward.

I suppose eating broccoli would be a similar preventive measure, but for this dish, I recommend going full-tilt anti-veggie. Just get some soluble fiber and you'll be fine. Maybe a glass of Benefiber?
Asshattatron Farkanaut, CGCFO
Chief Galactic Crockpot Foil Officer
Certified MOINK Baller & IMBAS Certified MOINK Ball Judge #0003 - Are you MOINK Certified?
Sole recipient of the Silverfinger and fingerlickin Awards!

Don't forget about the Throwdown Thingies!
The Secret Squirrel Society doesn't exist - Zero Club


Last edited by bigabyte; 10-14-2010 at 07:43 AM..
bigabyte is offline   Reply With Quote