You painted a very clear picture of your feelings on this subject. :-)
Pics are great, but don't hold back posting just because you don't have any.
Jambo Pit - UDS - Lang 60 (Sold)
18.5" & 22.5" Weber Kettles - Smokey Joe and Mini-WSM - Bubba Keg - #2 La Caja China
Impeccably Accurate BLACK & RED Thermapens
Operation BBQ Relief Founding Member
I am Obsessive Compulsive about BBQ. Google it.